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Brought to you by pratibha75</lj>and teemus</lj>

Some LJers knew about it, and so did a couple of people off LJ. A lot of thoughts went into the decision making. After a lot of advice and assurances from friends, J & I took the plunge. Yes, we have a new addition to our family :) Thanks to everyone who helped us in the trying times.  

teemus

"Did I ever tell you, your father was the best kite-runner in all Kabul. He made all the neighbourhood kids jealous. He'd run the kites, and never look up at the sky. Some claimed he was just chasing the kite's shadow.  But they didn't know him like I did. Your father wasn't chasing shadows. He just knew. That's all."

-from the movie, The Kite-Runner.

I had been planning to read this book for a while, but never got around to do it. In the days of the unemployment, I downloaded the e-book, with the thought to read it. But the idea of sitting in front of laptop, and not being able to turn the pages of a book, did not particularly thrill me. Two weeks ago, on an unplanned visit to Chennai, I picked up the book at Higginbothams, the book store at Chennai Airport.

To some on the LJ list, if you haven't read the book, and plan to read it, ignore my post. Its not a review, but my thought and perspectives on the book and the movie.

When I started to read it, I did not stop. I completed the book in a day. My heart was heavy and I felt sorry for the protagonist, Amir Quadiri. Through the earlier chapters, I felt anger seething in me for what he did, My heart was with Hassan. The boy who gave up a lot of things for his master. One particular section in the book was when Hassan was asked if he stole Amir's watch. 

An excerpt:

They'd both been crying; I could tell from their red, puffed up eyes. They stood before Baba, hand in hand, and I wondered how and when I'd become capable of causing this kind of pain.
Baba came right out and asked. "Did you steal that money? Did you steal Amir's watch, Hassan?"
Hassan's reply was a single word, delivered in a thin raspy voice: "Yes"

I flinched, like I’d been slapped. My heart sank and I almost blurted out the truth. Then I understood: This was Hassan’s final sacrifice for me. If he’d said no, Baba would have believed him because we all knew Hassan never lied. And if Baba believed him, then I’d be the accused; I would have to explain and I would be revealed for what I really was. Baba would never, ever forgive me. And that led to another understanding: Hassan knew He knew I’d seen everything in that alley, that I’d stood there and done nothing. He knew I had betrayed him and yet he was rescuing me once again, maybe for the last time. I loved him in that moment, loved him more than I’d ever loved anyone, and I wanted to tell them all that I was the snake in the grass, the monster in the lake. I wasn’t worthy of this sacrifice; I was a liar, a cheat, and a thief. And I would have told, except that a part of me was glad. Glad that this would all be over with soon. Baba would dismiss them, there would be some pain, but life would move on. I wanted that, to move on, to forget, to start with a clean slate. I wanted to be able to breathe again.

I waited for this scene to unfold, and strangely it did not overwhelm me as much as it did when I read the book. 

I wanted that, to move on, to forget, to start with a clean slate.

It makes me think of the times, I lied as a kid, to save my skin. I don't know if I got someone else in trouble, to be honest, I don't remember, but sometimes these kind of books get back a whirl wind of memories. Reading this book reminded me of a totally unrelated incident. I must have been 6 years old, invited to dinner at my father's colleagues home. The colleagues wife, served me food. I was eating, and had the mouth full, when she approached me and asked, "Beta, do you want anything else"? I wanted to reply a "No" after swalloing the food. I think I realised that it would take me time to do that, and I decided to nod a "No"  to her. Just as I did she, she asked me another question, "You did not like the food?" My nod coincided with the end of the question. I was mortified. To this day, I wonder what the lady would have thought of me.

When I got a chance to watch the movie a week later, I did. My first thought, as always is why cannot a movie be as good as the book. Why are details missed out? Throughout the movie, I knew what was supposed to come next, and when it was not shown, I thought to myself, "Wasn't this an integral part in the book?"

Like the time when Amir asks his father if they could have other servants, the faher at that time is gardening, but in the movie, they show him in the house, climbing the stairs. In the book, Amir picks up a fistful of sand, after his father refuses to entertain that thought and watches it flow through his fingers, and thoughts race in his mind. I wanted to see that scene. The scene where Amir knows in his heart that he's created that distance betwwen him and his father once again by asking that stupid question. If he could turn back time. 

If he could turn back time. I wonder how many times I could have done that, bitter notes excahnged after a fight, things that you don't mean, but yet blurted out. The book got back a lot of thoughts, and I'm still thinking of things that were meant to be. 

The book is depressing, and read it if you are sure that incidents from the book won't stay in your mind for a long time. I am left with thoughts of Hassan and Sohrab. And if you've read the book, let's share thoughts if you want to.

Some pics below, a still from the movie and the book cover and a view from my balcony today. 

Happy with life. Pleased with myself. Loving work. Trying to prioritise my needs and wants.Tired of setting up the house. Loves the new flat. Loves the cool breeze at night. Loves standing the balcony looking at the hills. Positive feelings. Cold in the AC. Sometimes cranky. Sometimes moody. Missing mom. Thinking too much. Wanting to buy another home. Making to-do lists. Hopes of winning a lottery. Hooked on to IPL. Rooting for Deccan Chargers. Meeting new people. Feeling old. Waking up early. Developing patience. Trying not to swear often. Hooked on to Text Twirl. Waiting for Lost. Waiting for the maternal instinct. Drinking too much coffee. Screwing my cousin's happiness. Not doing anything to lose weight. Raging a poke war in FB. Waiting for the launch of Iphone in India. Hasn't yet used the video cam at home. Saving money for the SLR. Wants a peaceful night's sleep. Will make chawal ka kheer on the weekend. Misses the bitching sessions. Misses Mumbai. Has found a new place to eat pork.


Loving these quotes: 

There is nothing so useless as doing efficiently that which should not be done at all. :Peter F Drucker
Coffee, Chocolates,and Men - something are bette rich: Anonymous